The Metamorphosis Of Childhood

metamorphosis of childhood

Most ten-year-olds can tell you the stages of development for a butterfly or a frog. A butterfly begins as an egg, becoming a larva, a caterpillar, then a chrysalis emerging into a butterfly. A frog starts as an egg, hatching into a tadpole, turning into a polliwog, at last transforming into an adult frog. At […]


Understanding The Three-Hour Work Cycle

three hour work cycle

Tired and agitated, Sara got ready for bed. What had happened to the day? She had woken up fresh that morning, ready to have a productive day. During breakfast, Sara’s assistant had called to alert Sara that she wouldn’t be in to copy the reports for the next day’s meeting. When Sara went to make […]


Find Three Things That Went Well

find three things that went well

“If I didn’t have bad luck I wouldn’t have any luck at all.” There are times in all of our lives that we can feel this way. Headed down a bumpy stretch of road, it can seem as if the trip is never going to end. A series of unfortunate or stressful events can create […]


No Quick Fix

no quick fix

We all look for it. It’s human nature to search for the easy way out, the fast buck and the simplest or cheapest solution. In human relationships there is no quick fix. Mutual trust and respect must form the foundation of any successful relationship. Without trust and respect, relationships flounder, and eventually whatever natural bonds […]


Alternatives To Punishment

alternatives to punishment

Six-year old Bobby walks into the kitchen from playing soccer. Bobby’s dad, Tom, had asked Bobby to take off his muddy shoes before entering the house. Red Georgia mud dotted the new hallway and den carpet. When Tom sees the footprints, he is furious about the mess and that Bobby had disobeyed him. ”Bobby,” Tom […]


Five Whys Can Help

five whys can help

”For whatever reasons my eight-year-old, Eric, is critical of everything his younger siblings do. Eric tells his sister that her coloring stinks. He tells his brother that his handwriting is messy. Last night Eric burst into tears because the peas touched his mashed potatoes. Nothing seems to make him happy right now,” Michael told me. […]


Turning Fear Into Love

Fear is a powerful motivator and behavior modifier. Fear, though, does not promote growth. Fear doesn’t promote kindness, caring or compassion in ourselves. Fear doesn’t open our hearts to new experiences. Fear doesn’t connect us to other people. What is the opposite of fear? Love. The opposite of love is not hate, but fear. Hate […]


Three Ways To Change Behavior

three ways to change behavior

“Lisa is so different from Grace. Grace never broke anything when she was this age. Lisa breaks something every day,” Meg told me at our playgroup with our one-year olds. Meg, a long-time friend, was over 30 when she had her first child. Five-year-old Grace lived up to her name. Grace was gentle and content […]


Use Your Thinking Hats

using your thinking hats

Some women get rocks set into precious metals for anniversaries, birthdays or Christmas. I get books. Over thirty years ago, my husband presented me with a jewel of a book for Christmas. I’ve used this gift to teach thinking skills to children and adults. The title? Six Thinking Hats by Edward De Bono. De Bono, […]


Sincere Praise Can Make A Difference

sincere praise can make a difference

One of the formative experiences of my early twenties was taking the Dale Carnegie Course in Public Speaking and Human Relations. Each class we focused on a tenet of Carnegie’s philosophy, one of which is to give sincere, honest appreciation. But giving honest and sincere appreciation can be a difficult skill to master. Some compliments […]