Dealing With Mealtime Messes

Dealing with mealtime messes

Dinnertime has always been an important time of our family’s day. It is the part of the day that we share the day’s events, discuss problems, as well as dreams. When our daughters were young dinnertime was perhaps only twenty minutes, and gradually grew to be an hour. Now that they are grown we enjoy […]


Avoiding Morning Madness

avoiding morning madness

Getting everyone out the door in the morning can feel like we’ve put in a full day’s work before 7 am. We have to deal with the sleepyhead, the dawdler, the procrastinator, the inappropriate dresser and the forgetful space cadet. Until we can let these characters have meaningful experiences they will continue to be difficult […]


Different Strokes For Different Folks

different strokes for different folks

But Sammy’s mother lets them eat ice cream for breakfast. One of our parenting and teaching challenges is to explain the rules, not only in our own homes and classrooms, but in those places where we have no control. As our children’s friends and relatives visit our homes, we’ll hear the phrase, more than once, […]


Wants Versus Needs

wants vs needs

To live is to consume. The first definition of consume is “to eat, drink or ingest.” Consumption is about taking care of hunger and thirst. The second definition is “to buy.” The third is “to use up.” Modern consuming is more about buying than eating or using things up. Advertising is a huge business to […]


Preventing Tantrums

preventing trantrums

Benjamin Franklin coined the phrase, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure,” in regards to fire prevention. If you’ve ever experienced a full fledged tantrum, you see how this advice might apply to tantrums. What we need is preventative parenting, the art of being able to say “yes” more often while gaining […]


Dealing With Meltdowns

Dealing With Meltdowns

Rage is one of the core emotional systems that kicks in when we feel like we are being physically or mentally restrained. Frustration is part of our core emotional system, as is anger. We have the ability to rage from birth as it acts as a type of energizer to get us to safety. Hold […]


Understanding Core Emotions

understanding core emotions

In her book, Animals Make Us Human, Temple Grandin asks the question: What does an animal need to be happy? Grandin lists five freedoms animals should have when in an intensive animal production situation: Freedom from hunger and thirst Freedom from discomfort Freedom from pain, injury or disease Freedom to express normal behavior Freedom from fear […]


Avoiding Transition Time Tears

avoiding transition time tears

“But, Daddy, I don’t want to go!” Moving from one event to another are difficult parenting and teaching situations. Our children are involved and concentrating on an activity, then life gets in the way. It’s bath time. It’s bedtime. Preschool is over. Daycare is closing. It’s time to get in the car. Resistance emerges. Tears […]


Do What You Say And Say What You Do

do what you say

“Throw rocks into the pool one more time and we’re leaving the party,” Jonathan’s parents told him. It was a surprise party for his grandparents’ anniversary. When Jonathan threw in the next handful of pebbles, nothing happened. Empty threats. It is an easy trap to fall into. We think if we mention the possible consequences […]


Gaining Cooperation

Gaining cooperation

“How many times have I told you…?” How would you complete the sentence? Perhaps one or several of these: Shut the door. Remember your lunch. Wash your hands. Set the table for dinner. Walk in the house. The list goes on and on. When we feel that our children are not listening to us—they become […]