Using Encouragement

using encouragement

A discouraged child is an unhappy child who is prone to acts of undue attention in the form of tantrums, whining, and more; acts of rebellion; acts of revenge, and acts of giving up and assumed disability. Oh woe is me! It’s easy to be around a child full of encouragement. He cooperates and contributes […]


Promises, Promises, Promises

Promises Promises Promises

In building healthy relationships it is important that our words and our actions match positively. Where we can get into trouble is making promises. Once we make a promise, we have put our integrity on the line. Circumstances may change that make our commitment untenable, but to our children a bond of trust has been […]


Actions Speak Louder Than Words

actions speak louder than words

My dad used to say that there were four basic types of people in the world. There are the people who say negative things and do negative things. They are pretty easy to spot and avoid. There are positive people who do positive things. These folks are harder to find, since they are rare. When […]


Letting Kids Figure It Out

letting kids figure it out

How are you going to find a way to use words to solve problems? Use the five-step problem solving method. In last week’s post we laid some ground rules for our family: that we will work together, as we are all in the same boat; and that we do not act or speak in a […]


Who Started It?

Who started it

“But Daaaad-deee he started it!” Sometimes we really do need the wisdom of King Solomon! It is difficult for us to know who actually started it. During the heat of the moment, though, it is perhaps best if we don’t try to resolve the dispute ourselves by telling one child what to do. We may […]


Create A Relationship Toolbox

create a relationship toolbox

What are simple ways we can create a lifetime of good health? In this series of articles we’ve looked at the positive benefits of… smiling, consuming less than 25 grams of sugar per day, having vitamin D3 levels at a minimum of 40 to 60 ng/ml, learning how to focus your mind, along with getting […]


Welcome Mistakes

welcome mistakes

“Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment,” read the sign in the gift shop. Since mistakes are at the forefront of learning, it is best if we can be friendly with error and welcome mistakes for the learning opportunities that they are. What have most of us been taught about mistakes? […]


Do You Know Who Your Children Are?

know who your children are

Summer nights, years ago, right before the news there was a public service announcement: It’s 10 o’clock, do you know where your children are? What I’d like to hear today is this: Do you know who your children are? When parents or grandparents contact me asking for advice about how to handle a child who […]


Setting Limits

setting limits

At a neighborhood coffee, my friend, Cheryl, announced that she had stopped eating sugar for several months. Several women gasped at the thought. “But that’s so limiting,” said one. Cheryl smiled and said, “Actually I find the limitation is quite freeing. I don’t worry any more whether I should eat something or not. Drawing the […]


Offer Freedom Within Limits

offer freedom within limits

Many of the difficult situations we have with our children involves getting them to do something they don’t want to do in a reasonable amount of time. Eating, getting dressed, going to bed, or taking a bath may be familiar conflict areas. When we give our children choices we can avoid conflict. These choices, or […]